testing

Just now, I went out with Daniel and Guibin. Just the three of us... We went for Karen's chalet. We did not stay long.
And the exciting journey begine. We went to the old turf club for seafood dinner. Hmmm, I did not eat the seafood (crab) but I have toufu and jie lan vegetables. Wow.. that is the 1st time being there and having dinner there is really nice.. "Old" friends, sitting down. Nice! Here come the fun part... Hehe.. We asked for the bill. A blur cute girl from china atend to us. We repeat 3 times we want the bill. And guess what? She serve us BEER. Haha.. we were all surprise!! haha Hmmm... interesting.

Daniel drove us around today. I was sort of happy. I pass some schools today. They are, Singapore Management University, Hwa Chong Junior Collage, National Junior Collage, Chinese High School, Nanyang Girls' School, Raffles Insititute etc.. Wow.. Dont know how to describe the feeling ah.. .

My thoughts are all mix u ah.. Have so many things to say but all jumper up.. it's ok. I am just trying to remember but it's ok.. they are not really important actually!

~PEACE~
I am thinking what should I do next.. Althought I am happy with my results, I felt lost!
I am lost... I am lost...

I pass!!!

I was going through my school website ah... My Values Reflection on My Journey. Haha.. I was reading it and laughing at it.. haha.. But to read it with another prespective, I felt that I've grow up ... :) Hmmm, written on 20/03/2002

Values Reflection - My Journey

'Every blade of grass has its angle that bends over it and whispers, 'Grow Grow'!' ~The Talmud

Each and every one of us is just like the grass. Each individual has their angles that bends over and grow. I had always like this quote ever since I came across it in one of the website. I started to understand this quote a little more throughout my 3 years of education in Temasek Polytechnic. These 3 years had somehow cause a great impact in my life. And somehow I am sure that I had made the correct choice.

After O levels, I have been planning what courses that I am interested in and which Polytechnic should I go. My plan was actually to get into some kind of Sciences courses in Ngee Ann Polytechnic. However, my grades convinced me that I was not eligible and hence ETCM (Electronics, Telecommunication, Computer and Microelectronics Engineering) become my first choice and I got into this course and began one of my important path in life I have to go through.

For these 3 years, I have to admit that the path I choose to walk isn’t as smooth as I had expected. It is full of ups and downs. During my first year of study in Temasek, I did not really do well but somehow I always managed to get through and was promoted to the second year of study. I was very playful then. My mind is in the “holiday” mood although I did not miss my lectures, tutorials but it resulted in a very huge setback for me. I failed my semester 1. I did very badly and had to repeat semester 1. I was angry, I hate myself for not studying enough and I convinced myself that I am stupid. During that period of time, I know I need encouragement from people and most importantly, from myself in order carry on. I have got nothing. Life still carries on. The sun still rises and the rain still falls.

New school term starts. I was in a total new class. Total stranger to the class. I become very “anti-social”. I was always alone. However, I tell myself that it will be a new beginning for myself. I start to attend lectures and staart to listen attentively. I started to pick up things. I follow the lectures carefully and slowly gain back the confident and convinced myself that I am not stupid. I become more cheerful. I begin to mix around and I got to know more friends. I get on smoothly.

I went through Student Internship Program and I like it. It is a total new environment for me to learn to apply things I had learnt in school. I was then attached to a company, which specialises in Building Automation. I am very happy that the experiences had brought more confidence in me. The things I had learnt in school can actually help me in an actual working environment. The taste of an working personal and a student was total fresh and different.

We need two hands to clap. This is a very important “theory” I’ve learnt. As each individual has different characters and style of working, sometimes it is very difficult to get a compromise in things we do. We argued and fought. This implies to group projects/assignments. Interpersonal skills among fellow friends, group mates, lecturers are extremely important. I had to learn to respect each and every individual so as to maintain a good relationship.

Presently, I am stepping into the last year of my course study. I want to graduate “peacefully” but things are not going on as smoothly as I had expected. However, I will continue with this fight. I believe in life, we had to work with little stress, setbacks, etc before we learn.

These years in Temasek Polytechnic have been good. I was being exposed to more then I could learn in books. Although my polytechnic education is coming to an end, things that I had pick up, see will always be with me regardless what I will be doing or the path that I will be walking. We are all growing no matter where we walk to, no matter how old we are.

I am glad the way things are now. And I am very glad that I had a deeper understanding of myself. Things are never going to be the same again.


'When the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls... the butterfly.' ~Richard Bach

Learn to appericate silence. . . Just be there. ~

Beautiful music still rings beautifully in your heart~!

I felt so grateful and thankful. Thank you everyone.
I felt so happy... so letting go of something that I have been holding on so closly can be so comfortable..
wow.... how can I not feel grateful and thankful?

°á±¹

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What you see is it is, or is it?

Listening to this song at 3:02am... thinking too much... brought away with my thoughts...

Sarah McLachlan - Angel

Spend all your time waiting for that second chance
For the break that will make it OK
There's always some reason to feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction or a beautiful release
Memories seep from my veins
Let me be empty and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
In the arms of the Angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent revelrie
You're in the arms of the Angel; may you find some comfort here
So tired of the straight line, and everywhere you turn
There's vultures and thieves at your back
The storm keeps on twisting, you keep on building the lies
That you make up for all that you lack
It don't make no difference, escaping one last time
It's easier to believe
In this sweet madness, oh this glorious sadness
That brings me to my knees
In the arms of the Angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent revelrie
In the arms of the Angel; may you find some comfort here
You're in the arms of the Angel; may you find some comfort here

. . . More then words can say... can you hear me calling out to you? My dear teacher...

I am just wondering will there be anyone who will post a conversation with grass or with a piece of strawberry cake?!?
That someone... must have love life, live life & cherish simple things. :)

We are shaped by out thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.
~ The Buddha

After a phone call, felt very strongly... Maybe it is a cycle.. Everyone is not happy...

Being happy is good, smile therapy.. but everyone is not doing it ah... sadness..

Non attachment~
Haha know what? I want to save some very nice sms from some different special people. However, I accidently deleted them. Every single one of them. Strange ah... Normally feel like deleting them but because of "bu4 She3 De2", I kept them for long long time. About 9 months. I told myself that it's attachment ah. hehe... :P Everything's gone now. I thought I will feel sad about it.. But I am not. On the other hand, I am smiling. I am happy about it. Non attachment... haha... Althought the sms are no longer visual to my eyes, they'll stay in my heart. I know as the time passes by, I will forget the content of the sms, But one thing for sure, the warmness felt by each sms receive always put a smile on my face. =)

Wow... it's only sms but I am so work up about it. Silly isn't it? BUT, that's the way I am. Haha...

Exists with the same old silly smile. :)